About 10 years ago my mom started telling me about the philosophy book “Power of Now” and how it teaches one should live in it and meditate on it only, not the future or the past. At the time it sounded like a trite idea so I more or less ignored it but after reading a book and a few posts on it as well as watching some videos that say the same thing, it’s beginning to seep in. This thought is a positive one that is relaxing not stressful. This post is only about how I am learning to rest in the now. There are ways to do it.
I am finding now that I have enough knowledge on certain topics to simply do them, without research. By that I mean, I don’t have to reinvent every wheel like I used to. Living in the moment can be blissful. it is important to remember in the heart of ones bliss that the now will continue for many years and you’ll still be caught up in it. So, after having learned the value of living in the now, how to I keep a mindset that prepares me for a perpetually enjoyable now? That’s what this post is about. I went to a funeral recently and it got me thinking about the choices I’ve made since high school. These days I’m thinking about living in the “now” more than ever. The choices I’ve made in my past shaped who I am on the way to now. The now allows no excuses, only facts. And this has me thinking about my road on the way to now.
My son is 16 and lately his favorite phrase to say when he’s wrong is, “That’s what I was going to say.” We chuckle at this because we know there are usually no “do overs” in life. Most the time you take your knocks and accept what you did wrong hoping to do right the next time. In life you can’t say: “That’s what I was going to say” and get credit. In other words, sometimes you get just one shot.
Imagine going to a friend’s funeral who was your same age and seeing 10-20 people there you hadn’t seen in over 20 years. I can tell you that just happened to me and it was quite an awakening. I realized that while some friends looked younger than others, we all looked older. So there we were, a bunch of 40-somethings waving awkwardly at each other because our friend was dead. Like I said, it was like an awakening. I know what I’ve been through since I was in high school. I’ve learned so many lessons it’s a wonder I am still here to enjoy the wisdom of my errors. As I looked around at people I used to know in that church, I wondered what must have happened to each of them along the way to now.
I wrote in a Twitter post that too many people I’ve known have died due to drugs. Why is it that we as a society think drugs are a valid way to get “high.” We need to redefine that term as a culture. Just like a sugar high takes you only so far and soon thereafter you crash, so it is with drugs only seven fold. It doesn’t matter if you’re an heir from the valley or a teenager in poverty, drugs will chew you up and spit you out. But I didn’t create this post to talk about drugs per se. They are what they are. I’ve known people who did them into their 70’s, held down a good job, and nobody ever knew. I suppose, if one makes it a lifelong commitment, one can have a life that includes drugs. I never make a judgment that way. As for me, I think about how sick I get when I have the flu. You know that feeling when you just want to die. I talked to someone who shared with me how a relative on her deathbed begged for them to just increase the drip enough to cause death. The relative declined and the dying person went on several more months suffering. I associate drugs with these feelings. I don’t think about the blissful stupor, the “escape” from life’s “pains.” Instead I think of how difficult it will be on the way back to the “now.” The now is all there is. Have you heard of Eckhart Tolle? He’s got some great things to say about living in the “now.” Here’s a great one I put on my quotes page:
The past is a dream, the future never comes, the “now” is all we have.
Eckhart Tolle (Paraphrased)
There really has been no future that has revealed itself any more than there has been a past that existed for me to wander through. All I ever recall is now and I have a feeling that is how it is going to be for eternity. Knowing that, I believe we might be better off thinking about what we do in light of how it will affect our “now.” I believe we’d be blessed if we could say,
On the way to now …
I believed,
I worked hard,
I loved,
I played,
I created,
I innovated …
If we saw time with others as a gift more and gave our “now” presence more to others, it wouldn’t matter what we did in the past. If we were concerned for making the now of our loved ones more fulfilling, it might makes us better of in the now of tomorrow and beyond. What we do on the way to now defines us and tomorrow will be now so choose what you do now wisely. I miss my friends I have lost terribly. If I can look at their lives as an example though to help others avoid my own pain, I will see my life as valuable to the world. I will do things on the way to now that are healthy and creative and that make the ride more comfortable for all those around me. I believe when we think of others before our self, we gain vision not ordinarily seen. Vision of what it’s all about, unencumbered by selfishness.